Fathers Be Good to Your Daughters

In case the title of this post doesn't ring a bell, it's from a John Mayer song entitled "Daughters." It's something that came to mind during today, it being Father's Day and all. As a matter of fact, I'm listening it to it as I write this post.

It's a funny thing, this song. It makes me think about how true some of those sayings are, that women look for signs of their fathers in men that they date, spend the rest of their lives with, promise themselves to. I used to think it was a quaint notion, wanting a man who was like your dad, until I realized--not too long ago--that that's exactly what I was looking for. I was surprised, to be honest, especially because while my dad's amazing, he's not perfect (but then again, no one is). I don't come from a broken home at all, either. My parents have been married for twenty years and are still going strong (too strong?). When I look at their marriage versus the singular relationship that I've had in my short lifetime of nineteen years, hell yeah, I want a man like my father. But seriously, when I look at my dad, I shake my head and laugh a little, because he has everything that I want in a man.

My father is a hard-working individual that worked himself from the bottom, the youngest child in a fairly poor family, to graduating medical school, moving to the United States, and becoming successful. And while we are by no means rich by American standards, we have a comfortable living, a homey living, and a family-centered one. My dad, unlike most dads, is a family man. He is devoted to his wife, my mother, and showers her with love and affection, because for them, every day is an occasion to love. He loves his kids--me and my sister and brother--don't remember a day when he hasn't come home exhausted, and yet musters the energy to listen to our chatter, eat dinner with us, have dessert and humor each one of us by listening to our stories, bad jokes, or music. And in the quieter hours, he is content while we all lay about in different areas of the master bedroom, even just sitting there in silence, happy in the company that we're sharing just by being together. He constantly preaches about working hard, staying focus, and not sweating the small stuff while also flying helicopters (boys and their toys), playing video games with my brother (again, boys and their toys), and taking us out for ice cream, pizza, or satisfying the menstrual cycle cravings of his three women (what a guy).

But beyond all the toys, the buying of gifts, the satisfying of his womenfolk and just his unadultered presence in our lives, my dad has taught me the most important thing: what love should look like. That I, in a man, should look for someone who is selfless, hardworking, a provider, a lover, a partner in all things, someone who will love me, care for me, and most importantly: respect me. Because when my dad looks at my mom, I don't just see love. I see a loving respect that creates more love, because the respect he has for her translates into admiration, which means that their love continues to grow throughout the years.

Happy, happy Father's Day to all you wonderful dads out there, mine included.

"Fathers be good to your daughters, 

your daughters will love like you do."

- John Mayer